Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
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