everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
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