you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
she looked like the before picture.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Randomize
