theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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