Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
