i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Everything about him screamed your future.
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
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