Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
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