I cockslap morals
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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