I seem to have left my pride at pride
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
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