Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
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