Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Randomize
