You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
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