My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
Randomize
