we're chasing vodka with high fives
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
Randomize
