My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
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