I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Randomize
