I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Randomize
