I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
