Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
