C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize