that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Randomize
