Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Randomize
