end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
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