Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
