We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
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