I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
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