I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize