now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
