my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
