Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Randomize
