I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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