My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
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