So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
