Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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