I must be too annoying 4 u.
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize
