Since when is my name a synonym for head?
of course. lets lasso hookers.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
Randomize
