The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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