Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
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