We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
Randomize