I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
Randomize
