kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
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