yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
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