I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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