Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
My ass is underappreciated
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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