Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
