if i died would you start the facebook group?
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize