I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
please come you make the beer taste better
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Randomize
