I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Randomize
