FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
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