Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
