Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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