I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
Operation Purity has been aborted
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize